#27 The Confessions of an Opium Eater...

Dear Don1001,

I don’t know what else Samuel Coleridge was right about, but he was right about eating opium, it does give you a different outlook on life. I’ve had to start eating my opium because I can’t spare the oxygen to smoke it anymore. My plants aren’t giving off as much oxygen as I thought they would, anyway I’ve started eating my opium instead of smoking it and my lungs feel a Hell of a lot better. Once you’re on a pipe binge you go until you nod out and that can rip the shit out of the respiratory system. So between not smoking and more oxygen, I’m breathing much better. I sometimes think that the lack of O2 was causing some of my anxiety attacks, but probably not. It’s watching numb nuts from the far right and far left trying to run the government that can make you want to stab knitting needles into own eyes. It doesn’t matter whether you’re right of Attila the Hun or left of Nancy Pelosi, you know that the country will go belly up because of debt unless we adopt single payer healthcare and start rationing our medical resources. You can call me a drug addicted, Commie, brain addled Fascist (which may or may not be true) but at least I’m not in denial. As a shit-load of boomers start to make demands on the healthcare system, someone is going to have become a hard ass about the situation. And it starts with Doctors, “Mr. Johnson your 45 pounds overweight, smoke, eat badly and don’t exercise, if you don’t change 3 out of 4 of these bad habits or I’m cutting off your health care.” That’s it, either shape up or you’re chucked out of the system. We could have a little ceremony (sort of like in the movie “Beau Geste”) where your health card is ripped up and you’re promptly escorted out of the building (and then we could see how Christian the country really is). Then we would move onto Nursing Homes, where we start hiring retired Military drill instructors. Old people do not need to be coddled, they needed to be pushed and prodded. The more able old people should be harnessed and made to work at least a half-day doing what is most productive. Now before start condemning me as a barbaric pinhead, this accomplishes two things right off the bat; first it slows down illegal immigration (who would to come here, if you knew you had to work until the day you died) and second, it’s a great incentive to take care of yourself and stay out of a Nursing Home as long as possible. If you knew retirement was going to be like Boot Camp and you wouldn’t be so likely to retire, would you? That concept will single handedly save Social Security and our true way of American life. And finally Single Payer means U.S. business would have the albatross of healthcare off of their backs so they could go back to ripping the rest of the World a new one.

                                           Hoping we have the guts, Brother Gregory

You can see videos of these sage observations here: http://www.youtube.com/my_videos?feature=mhum
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